Blessings in Formica

Back in 1946, when my Mom thinks my great Aunt Jean and Uncle Dale got this formica table, I’m certain they never imagined that almost 75 years later their great great niece Audrey (Little Bit) would have this thing called a laptop sitting on it, and would be using it as a desk for virtual…

Compass or Baggage

Love is never ever ever selfish. Love is never present when there are excuses or narratives or explanations. Love does not coexist with those things. Love is black and white in terms of its presence. It's either evident or it is absent. If a person's behavior is selfish, the only love involved is the individual's…

City Management

I manage a city. I manage a city, and I have every job within the city. When things go awry with my children or their friends, or even with kids at school they don’t really know, I am on the other end of the 9-1-1 call. My job is to ask just enough questions to…

What is Winning?

  You win. #winning. Win-Win. What does it mean to win? Outside of sports, where there are clearly defined rules and generally a person or team has a better score, what does it mean to win? Search Twitter for #winning and you’ll quickly see that winning is political and we have redefined it as proving…

There Is Only One Me

There is only one me. I say it all the time in my head when there’s just too much. I occasionally say it out loud when multiple people are talking to me at the same time. There is only one me. I can only be in one meeting at a time, in one place at…

Refurbish, Brave Girl

I hate messes. I don’t like sand in my car, I don’t like PlayDough that gets stuck in toys supposedly designed for PlayDough, I don’t buy glitter or powder or terrariums if I can help it, and I don’t like substances like Desitin or vegetable oil that are really hard to clean off of things.…

Melancholy Mom Notes to My Girls

When you are sad or hurting it breaks my heart. I would rather feel the pain of someone smashing a limb of my own than watch you struggle. Watching you struggle and knowing the reason why fills me with sadness and regret. And it motivates me to do absolutely everything possible to make the remainder…

Alice in Wonderland

My first glimpse of truth was at a costume party. He took me to her house for the event, and the two of them enjoyed shots with neighbors and work pals while her husband and I watched them like they were our errant children, laughing about how they couldn’t hold their liquor and wouldn’t make…

Brave Girl Wannabe is Angry

The bravest people I know are children surviving the behavior of selfish adults. The bravest people I know are children who try to offer forgiveness in scenarios where "adults" like me simply cannot. The bravest people I know are children who admit they are afraid and ask for help. The bravest people I know are…

Go Into The Light, Brave One

I think I have seen every episode of Friends at least a couple times. Some of them I’ve probably seen a dozen times - I especially love the Thanksgiving episodes and the ones from the season where the main characters have switched apartments. One of my favorite Phoebe moments is in an early episode and…